The Power of Emotions: Lessons in Control and Growth
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Hey my fellow souls! My new book is live - Many Lives, One Soul: My Journey to Becoming Whole
Marc Tagliaferri
August 16, 2024
So, how y'all doing?.....
So, how y'all doing?.....
I'm doing alright. I've been trying to get this emotion blog done for a long time, but it's been real busy. A lot going on, and a lot of me not controlling my emotions.
But today I was sitting in my kitchen, looking outside the window at all the bird feeders, trying to figure out how, next year, I'm gonna set them up so the deer don't eat all the food, even though I feed the deer too. You know? It's a fun problem to solve because I just really do enjoy feeding the animals. And then, my phone dinged.
It made a stupid little noise on Messenger, which I normally don't even keep on, but it was on. So I went and took a look, and it got me thinking. I won't say who sent it to me or where it came from, but it said a certain group isn't allowed to have emotions. So I'm gonna say this very clearly, like I've said it my whole life. I said it when I was a little boy in the seventies and eighties when things were different, and I'd put my back to one of my friends on the playground, and we'd scrap together.
We may not have looked alike, I guess you'd say, but he had a soul and blood just like me, and that made us no different. But in this weird world we live in, everyone wants to separate from everyone else, thinking they're better or have a leg up, or, "I'm the pimp," you know?
You gotta be the man all the time. Everybody thinks we're a bunch of Fonzies, but at the same time, they say not to be the Fonzie. So what's up with that? Ay, right?
Kinda funny. I did like the show, though. And sometimes, I'm in the restroom, I think of it. But I tell you, emotions are the key to everything that I'm learning.
You know, I've been on this earth for a little while. I've made countless mistakes because I couldn't control my emotions. And to tell you the truth, I thought I was in control. I thought I understood exactly who I was, exactly what I was supposed to do, and I've been talking about it my whole life. But in all reality, that's not the case. I mean, yes, I felt I knew, but my emotions have actually made my life a lot harder than it needed to be.
You know, I can blame anybody I want. I can point fingers in any direction, and all of you can do the same, and I'm sure a lot of you do. But there's something I've noticed about this. Well, let me just say this for a minute: When I was a kid, I used to love to sit on Santa Monica Boulevard on the back of the bus stops. Like, I wouldn't sit on the bus stop; I'd sit on the back of it to try to let the bus driver know I didn't need a ride, so he wouldn't stop. I'd get something to drink and a bag of chips, and I'd just sit there for hours and watch everyone. And to me, it was great entertainment.
I mean, even in the first book I wrote, when I decided to leave the drug-ridden world that I had led myself into, called "Tagalong," I talk in the very first chapter about these three bums (One was a woman, and the other two were men,) and how a fight started and how it ended. Back then, I very wrongly laughed about it and had some pretty shitty stuff to say. You know, is that growth? I don't know if it's growth. I think it's controlling your emotions.
I mean, one thing I've noticed for sure is that any man or woman who's successful isn't just successful because of their hard work, which I'm sure is the case, but also because they can control their emotions. They can control decisions. They can control that moment. You know, whatever they have to do in that moment to get to the next moment, they do it right, and they level up. The universe will level them up for the fact it's almost like it rewards them.
You ever notice people that can't control their emotions? It's like a shit show. Pandora's box. And if you don't believe for a minute that people can't see it in you, you're wrong. I always thought I was so clever because I do have different personalities.
So I always felt like I could use that as an in and out, I guess. But I never really stood back and looked at myself to see what others might see. And, man, I never even took the time to realize that I'm not the smartest man in the world, and everyone starts at the same place. Everyone has gifts. Everyone has intelligence.
So how could they not see it? And how do they not use it to their advantage? I've made countless decisions based on what other people want because I couldn't control my emotions. I mean, it's really something to think about because I am not any different than any of you. I think some of you are better off probably because you controlled your emotions.
But I'm not gonna give up on that growth. Right? But anyways, I gotta say everyone is equal. Emotions, I think, are the key. I think that's what separates everyone.
So there's been a couple of deaths in the area where I live in the past couple of days, and both of them were really good men. One man, well, both men actually, have directed or changed the world around them in many ways, affected millions and millions of people, and done so much good. It's unbelievable. And both of these men, in many aspects, are why I'm able to try to do "Deuce's Two Cents," to try to do my "Tagalong Soul," or even now as I'm looking out this window, watching the birds and my cat trying to catch one, which I hope she doesn't get. You know, it's amazing.
So I would just like those men to know that I appreciate them. I never forgot them, and I never will forget them. They were examples. And another man I know, whom I care for a lot, I kinda look up to this man. I was watching him the other day, and he is directly affected by this. And you could see the pain in him, but he just kept going. He just keeps getting it done. You know?
Left, right, left. Kudos to him. And it made me realize that I really need to focus on my emotions and that I really need to find a better way. Maybe put a string on my finger like they told us when we were kids or tap my leg or something. And that's my advice to any of you too.
I mean, if you can control your emotions, I bet your life would be different too. And even if your life is great, I bet you could still find a way to be better. It just blows my mind when I received that text, and they act like they're trying to separate. Everyone's trying to separate all the time. It's crazy.
I mean, I understand sometimes you have to separate, whether you want to or not, because of circumstances, but aren't circumstances connected to emotions? And emotions connected to circumstances? It's really wild to me the way the universe works, but it is also very rewarding. So the past five years, to me, have been just a shit show. Like, I don't even know what happened.
I had goals. I had plans. It's like it was all a waste, but I know it wasn't a waste. I know I made the best efforts, but I know I did a lot wrong in it because of where I'm sitting now in my circumstances. And I guess I could sit in the corner and cry all day, or I could stand on my ashes, as I talk about, and do this warrior figure in my mind.
But I'm really not a warrior figure. I'm just a soul like the rest of you. And I definitely don't want to make these mistakes again. So I'm telling you my mistakes. Hopefully, you guys can learn from them too, like I learn from other people.
You know, the saddest part to me is that at one time, I thought I was better than some people, and I think that's a joke. And anybody else that thinks that, I think that's a joke too because you're not. Maybe different circumstances, but you're not. The key is how we treat each other.
There's a guy that lives by me. It's crazy. No matter how nice I am to this dude, no matter how I take the conversation, it always ends up with me and this guy arguing with each other. I mean, over the stupidest crap. We were arguing over the deer the other day.
It's unbelievable. But maybe he sees me the way I see him. Maybe he feels the same way I'm telling you I feel about him right now. We just haven't found a way to connect yet. But I will say to his credit and my credit, we definitely have peace among ourselves.
We definitely have, I believe, mutual respect. But it makes no sense to me why we can't communicate. That's also the way I feel about the world. But at the same time, I understand because every day, I walk by hundreds of people. I don't talk to them anymore. They don't talk to me. I don't know. It's kinda unique.
The other day at work, I was at lunch, and I was heating up some Kentucky Fried Chicken. I love some Kentucky Fried Chicken. Oh, with some gravy, some taters, and that mac and cheese. Oh, I ain't playing, that's some good stuff. So I'm heating up some chicken strips, and this guy walks up to me randomly and says, "Man, hey Marc, doesn't anybody like you?"
And I paused for a minute. I turned around and looked at him. I said, "Hell no, bro. Why would they like me?" And then, he kinda chuckled.
I'm not gonna lie, it kinda got on my nerves. So I turned around and looked at him and said, . "Well, bro, I'm gonna put it to you this way: If they're talking, then I guess they're interested. And if they're hating, then maybe I'm doing something right. But either way, my name's in their mouth. Something to think about. Right?”
The thing that irritated me about this guy is, when he needed me to be there for him, I was there. When he needed me to pray for someone he loved, I did it. I've known this guy for a long time, and I respect his family. The uniqueness of it is that it came out of his mouth. I couldn't place it. But what I did place was my emotions.
And I'm still not angry. Like, I'm not, you know, taking it out on anybody or anything like that. But it just reminds me that no matter where you are or where your travels have taken you, if you can't control your emotions, you're gonna always fail. Because that was a failure situation for me if I would've said the wrong thing. And all I was doing was heating up some KFC, man.
I'll tell you, all I was doing was sitting there looking at my birds when somebody sent me a text of negativity, trying to mask it with positivity. It's crazy. Right? I just wanna say that I think everyone in the world is equal.
I just wanna say that I know I've made all my mistakes, and I'll continue to make mistakes. But I'm gonna continue to try to control my emotions because I believe that's the key. I believe it's the key to everything for everyone. So if you don't know that, I hope this helped you. And if you do know it and you're ignoring it, I hope it reminded you.
And if you already know and you're kicking ass with it, well, keep going because I'm gonna be watching you and learning. Because I wanna be a better man. I'm gonna be a better man. I have a lot going on and I'm really excited.
I believe the universe will change things if I keep grinding. But there are those days where you just wanna crawl into the dark night, you know, and just disappear. But you gotta remember there's that light. There's that hope. And I believe in my learning, in my time, that it's in the emotions.
So y'all have a blessed day. I hope everyone finds some peace in the day. I hope everyone has a fun laugh. I hope everyone gets to break some bread with someone.
And, wait. You know what? Hey, wait. Before I go, I wanna say something.
I did meet this other guy this week. It's pretty cool because, you know, I kinda shelter myself wherever I go now. I really don't like talking to people sometimes because you just don't know what's gonna come out of their mouth. But I gotta say, this one guy, I kinda like him, man. He found me.
He just walked up to me and sat down and started talking. I don't know his name, but I know who he is. But he's a good guy. I don't know, just something to think about, right? I know we're gonna have a friendship in the future, and I want it with this person.
Another guy this week, I didn't see for a few days, and I realized that I actually like him. But my emotions told me that I didn't like him because of a circumstance that he needed me to help him with, and I wasn't patient with him.
Everyone, be careful of your emotions. They're your enemy as much as your friend. Anyways, I'm gonna go now. Thank you for your time. Thank you for your ear, and I'm sure I'll be blogging something soon.
Emotions can control you....mp4"Stay blessed, stay true to yourself, and always remember, you’re never alone on this incredible journey. Wishing you an abundance of peace, love, and an overflow of good vibes until our paths cross again. Thanks for being a part of this adventure with me. Until next time, Deuces!"
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