I think he was of foreign descent. Of course he had an accent, kind of like Russian descent or European descent. Anyways, he was over there where I feed the birds and he was doing his exercise and stretching from being there all night. When I came to work I saw him there and he's stretching and he's praying. And the fact that he was over there praying and stretching and talking about elements of life in the same place, I do every day moved me. So I went inside and. I gathered a water bottle, with 2 packs of Cheez-its. And then I went and got a cocoa. I bought myself one and  him one. I took it out to him.

I mean, I've written and I've done this and I've done that, but I've always kind of beat around the bush about what I'm talking about. A bit afraid of it, even though I'm sure of myself and afraid of what? I don't know. It's really kind of stupid, I think at this point. And I mean, I actually truly believe that about myself, not that I'm stupid, but like I need to get going. I need to step up.

You know, this week I went and saw the Bob Marley movie and what a great inspiration he's been my whole life. Mark Twain too, you know what a great inspiration he was. I was in his house when I went traveling with my grandmother when I was a young lad. To be honest with you, I reached over the purple rope in his room where I wasn't supposed to be  and I touched his chair. What an honor to touch the chair of the great Mark Twain, the author. Sometimes I think that's why I try to do what I do. I think he may be with me. You're probably laughing at me because I'm not doing anything. He wasn't afraid. Either was Bob Marley. I mean I knew that then when I was a kid, but to watch the movie that they put out. Both those two men are just very resounding to me at this point in my life. Very pivotal. Very soul opening, I guess you could say. You can't even really say eye opening, or as I'd say my pituitary gland. Anyways, I really resonate with both of them.

So with that I would like to say that I think that fear is a huge factor, but I also think that it's okay to be different. It's okay to be yourself. It's okay for an individual to be 1. By paying attention to those two lives, and what I've lacked in my life is that I didn't listen much to a small group of people that cared, as they have. And by doing that through this week, I was able to hear some words from a various group of guys. One I like to call Mr. Tunstall. One guy is ironically from Angola, NY. Another guy I have know for 20 years and he has seen it all with me. Then there are the 3 I met through football. One of them loves Michigan football and we met because our boys played together. On those same fields I met another guy, and he speaks Japanese. That is pretty cool. And there is one I met way back at the little AKL fields and he is also a Michigan fan. I am glad to know them all. I mean, really, most people are gone. So realizing that is not only about being strong as an individual but it's with the people around you that make you strong. I mean, it really is important to realize that, and that's something I think I've lacked in my travels. But I don't lack now and might have been something I was missing that those two men didn't miss. But anyways right it is called lessons. It's called growing. It's called learning. You have to be willing to do it, and I'm definitely trying.

Somewhere in his home he had a Sports Illustrated Raider jacket still in the package that guy had given him because he had told a story to him. So the next day, that guy brought this jacket to him, still in the package, and gave it to him and said, you know, here's to the Raider nation. Keep it going. So on that the guy went to the game and unfortunately the Raiders lost. But I guess you know, of course he had a beautiful time with his family and he had everything that an NFL game can bring for any fan, I'm sure.

But the coolness is that in hearing that story, is that my son was able to say, well that guy is my dad. It was pretty cool and I guess they had a good moment. It felt really good that my son shared that with me. Then it made me realize, maybe I'm just holding onto too much anger. Maybe I say I'm growing, but I'm not growing. Maybe I can't let go of the past, you know, I've done a lot of shit. I've tried to fixed it. I've done things, I've grown. I've made mistakes. But also I don't think I've been treated too well myself, personally, by many people. So maybe my problem is I can't get over the anger. Maybe I can't. Maybe I'm the one holding myself back. And using fears as an excuse. Or using situations as an excuse? You know, I don't think I'm stupid, and I know I'm more than one. I know I'm having a battle just to do this, so it kind of seems like it might be a pretty good possibility.

It's been like I said, it's been a pretty eye opening week. I got a lot going on. That story also made me realize I still remember him too. And it's awesome that he's bonded with my son and I miss him. I think he was a great guy. But it also reminded me that it's okay to be nice, it's okay to be different, it's okay to be yourself. Even if people don't understand. And not to allow yourself to change because you say you're not angry. On that, don't change. I did. I was weak. I acted like I wasn't, but. I know I was.

So now with all the stuff we found, we're gathering it together. We're going to try to put it in a caldron, I guess you could call it, but in a positive way. Why can't it be positive? Anyways we're going to put it together. We're actually writing another book. It will be coming out. I'm very excited about it. That's all I'm going to say. I just wanted to put it out there. It'll be better than the next one. We always grow with improvement. God bless on that and the elements of life for I thank all of them for our growth through Jesus. But I guarantee you I forget no one. Anyways, very excited and I will continue to blog because it is a great place to vent and I really enjoy it for myself. I appreciate anyone that listens.